30 September 2005

Trouble Me

It's a lighthearted image, Pooh Bear with his loved friends, Tigger and Piglet.  They are saying, "I love you this much" with arms open wide, spread from handhold to handhold and beyond the tips of their paws.  It's unconditional love.  It's BIG love.

Within these past two weeks, there have been some very serious events going on around me.  Some of my loved friends are worried and stressed to the point of illness.  Some are suicidal and have actually attempted suicide.

One very special person to me, I love her so much, met with me for awhile this evening.  She told me that once again, cancer has been discovered to have spread within her father's wiry frame.  She is 30 and facing the very real possibility that her father might be gone in a few weeks, or a few months.  She is praying with all her might that the doctors are interpreting the test results wrong.  The two of them are going to drive 5 hrs (round trip) to have another test done Monday.

Oh, where's her mom, you ask?  This lovely woman, this strong friend whom I love so much, cared for her mother who had dementia while this friend was in high-school and college.  Her mother is now in a nursing home.

This woman is so strong, she finds it hard to ask for and accept help.  I want so badly to do something, but all I can do is be there and hope that she will "trouble me" when I can provide a helpful listening ear and a soft cushy shoulder that can absorb tears.  She has already dealt with so much more than a person should, including brain cancer and surgery in her 20s.

I know she's strong.  But I know sometimes my strength would make me so brittle that when I cracked, I shattered and it all came undone.  Even though that does not mean the same would occur in her situation, I would hate that so.

10000 Maniacs - Trouble Me Lyrics
[ music: Dennis Drew/words: Natalie Merchant ]
[ backing vocals: Jevetta Steele ]
Trouble me, disturb me with all your cares and your worries.
Trouble me on the days when you feel spent.
Why let your shoulders bend underneath this burden when my back
is sturdy and strong?
Trouble me.

Speak to me, don't mislead me, the calm I feel means a storm is
there's no telling where it starts or how it ends.
Speak to me, why are you building this thick brick wall to
defend me when your silence is my greatest fear?
Why let your shoulders bend underneath this burden when my back
is sturdy and strong?
Speak to me.

Let me have a look inside these eyes while I'm learning.
Please don't hide them just because of tears.
Let me send you off to sleep with a "There, there, now stop
your turning and tossing."
Let me know where the hurt is and how to heal.

Spare me? Don't spare me anything troubling.
Trouble me, disturb me with all your cares and your worries.
Speak to me and let our words build a shelter from the storm.
Lastly, let me know what I can mend.
There's more, honestly, than my sweet friend, you can see.
Trust is what I'm offering if you trouble me.


  1. I am so very sorry to hear this......and yes, I hope she "troubles" you!  Anne

  2. I hope you keep doing what it is that you're doing. Sometimes just having someone to care can make the difference between giving up, and moving forward.



Thanks for taking the time and effort to let your thoughts be known!