some days, it is a struggle to get up, out of bed, to contemplate taking a shower, (usually if i can get so far as the bathroom, bushing my teeth is priority), getting dressed is a choir, let alone doing anything constructive.
some days are like that.
i have fewer of those days, these days.
every day was like that for the better part of two years. and i
gave up on trying to explain to friends and family that pulling myself
up by my bootstraps wasn't the answer, namely cuz i wasn't wearing
them. i stopped trying to explain that taking a walk was
exhausting not invigorating. I gave up on trying to find the
words to describe how I was feeling, mentally, physically, emotionally.
now, i co-facilitate support groups for those with mental illnesses and
brain disorders. i advocate when and where possible for those who
feel helpless and voiceless. i educate various groups, including
those who are mental health care providers.
when it comes to friends and family, i've given up trying to explain,
advocate, etc. i think that's sad and wrong. one of these
days, i'll be brave enough, coherent enough to talk to them and explain
one of these days.