18 February 2008

my head, my mind, my nerves

Muscadines, scuppernongs, and other fresh from the vine grapes (not supermarket grown) pulp pops outta the skin whole.  I feel like I could do that.  That my skin is too tight, that I'm ripe to pop outta my skin, is how I've felt for about a week now.  Sometimes I got it under control, and can endure.  Then there are those times when it is unbearable.  Yet I do bear up, cuz the alternative is not even an option.

Not at this time.

Tomorrow, I will take my counselor all my documents pertaining to this ongoing battle with the Dept of Edu regarding the discharge of my student loans.  I qualify, under their own stated policy.  But we have been fussing over the same stage for about a year now (actually, closer to two).  There is one step past this, and that is not a problem.

The standard delaying tactics are wearing my nerves thin and my skin thinner.  My mind is more muddled.  The noise in my head is ratcheted up, amped to a continuous roar with mind-splitting shards driving deep.

It is killing me.

1 comment:

  1. {{{hugs}}} virtual though they may be.  

    Not at this time.  Not ever.  



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