10 September 2008

no excuses

Last night, I did something I am so not proud of.  And of course, I'm sharing it when instead I could be sitting nice and pretty and keeping my mouth shut.  Well, last night, I should have kept my mouth shut.  sigh.

Instead, I left a score of messages (ok, that is a slight exaggeration, it wasn't twenty; it just feels like it) on my ex-guy's cell phone.  cringe.  I was hateful and hurtful.  I mean, I was completely full of hurt and full of hate and feeling righteous rage; which all overflowed and spewed forth in a very ugly display of all sorts of feelings.

Feelings are fine, but unfortunately, I let loose and acted on those rather toxic feelings.  I'm deeply ashamed and this morning, first thing, I did call and apologize.  I regret having been so low and ugly.

What I said, I meant, yes.  That is still no excuse for having said all that in the first place, especially in the manner which I did so.  My sincere apologies were/are expressed.  I realize tho that that does not excuse the actions I committed.

I'm very sorry for having been so ugly, hateful, hurtful, and low.  'Twasn't my finest hour(s).  I take full responsibility for my actions.

No excuses.

3 comments:

  1. After what he did to you? You had a good couple hundred rants coming to you, lil nut!
    Let it make you feel BETTER.
    xo

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  2. ah honey, We've all done shit like that.  Roll with it!  Besides, I'm sure he deserved it!   Anne

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  3. He deserved every bit of it and more! Yet, knowing you, I know it wasn't your nature to be hurtful. It's done and over now...but I gotta ask didn't it feel good to get that out of your system and give it to him both barrels? (Hugs)Indigo

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Thanks for taking the time and effort to let your thoughts be known!