I did not wake in to a progressing panic attack. I'm not feeling completely calm, but comparatively? I'll take it! My lower torso is a stew of turmoil, but the embroilment is not so overwhelming and isn't infiltrating every other physical system (ya know, musculature, nervous, etc.) and my mind is not blown apart at this moment. The noise of hurt, protestation, chiding, etc is still there, but has died down to a manageable level that allows me to be somewhat clear and able to function a bit better.
These last five days have been indescribable, altho I've attempted to use words to convey how I feel and think but there is not way to be adequate and yet, you have compassion and that is so very reassuring. I appreciate you, dear loving loyal readers. Thank you so very much for helping me remain sane while struggling thru this.